Are you a good person?

If you opened this post, it’s probably because you want to improve yourself in any aspect. You might not recognize that, but by being here, by being open to read and reflect on this topic, it already makes you a good person. There will always be something we have done in our lives that makes us feel less good about ourselves. And so what? Who never?

How caring for yourself are you?

I decided to write this post because I constantly deal with or observe the following characteristics on people. There are some people who do their best to look like a good Samaritan, in an exemplary, by-the-book way. These people tend to impose their behavior, actions, and choices while criticizing everyone that has different approaches. Others, they feel they have made so many mistakes, or they are so privileged in life, that they do everything in their power to help others, with this immense feeling of never doing enough. And then, the biggest majority who do not have any major mission in life and therefore feel they are not worthy people.

Well, before keeping on, note that I am using the common terms good and bad, which are really relative. I believe there is always good and bad in everyone, but the idea with this reflection is that you stop being so hard on you!

First of all, we all need to understand that, in order to be a good person, to have a positive impact in the world, to actually make the difference and yet to still enjoy ourselves and to fully live our lives with plenitude, we need to first love ourselves.

Remember that you are everything that you have in life; all the rest is relative and might be ephemeral.

Several months ago I was having a conversation with someone very close to me, and I was telling her how I feel bad that I don’t do more. I don’t volunteer to major causes, I have a hard time facing people who I see as vulnerable, or with hard living conditions, as well as hunger or deep poverty. Although I have been working on those feelings my whole life, trying to strengthen up, I still have no emotional structure to deal with those situations. However, I also don’t donate money or sponsor children from third world countries. At the time of this conversation, I was going through a quite tough time in my life and it was being hard to put myself together. This person told me something that made me think: “honey, how can you give water to someone else if your glass is almost empty?”.

Fill your glass, so it can overflow to others…

As time passed by, I kept those words in my mind. First I started looking at myself and I started recognizing that by being myself, by being loving and caring to those around me, by being respectful to everyone, as well as aware and empathetic for world issues, I was already being a good person. Even at that point, where I felt so down, in the shadow, lost and unsure, I didn’t need to crash other people to get where I wanted to be; I would genuinely feel happy with other people’s happiness and achievements; and I still had emotional support to give to someone asking me for comfort. At that point I had nothing else to give, I had no energy to take action towards a charity cause or even emotional strength to volunteer in a hospital.

But again, those words kept resonating in my mind and every time I would have the impulse to criticize myself, I would actually vocalize them so I could hear my voice.

When my glass filled up, I did not decide to volunteer, I did not choose a cause to donate money to and I did not decide to sponsor a child in need. But I discovered what I needed to do – what actually made sense to me -, and that’s how the idea for Arunny was born. As hard as it has been to keep it alive, I don’t give up, because now I know what I am meant to do.

And you? Do you think you are a good person? Do you identify yourself with any of the profiles I described above? How well do you take care of yourself before taking care of others? I will love to hear!

And if your glass is empty, the first drop would be my love to you <3



2 replies on “Are you a good person?

  • Catarina

    I feel so happy to read your texts/experiences. I believe there is a time in our lives where we do start searching more accurately for that special something that is missing and it is amazing to see you are finding yours and helping others find theirs too. I believe myself to be a good and kind person that, above all, loves seeing others happy…a lovers couple showing meaningful feelings and attention to each other, someone helping someone with a baby pram, having someone letting another go ahead of them in traffic…these little things I (continue to) see everyday are the kind of things that put a smile on my face.
    Just like you I think about what can I do more but I also believe that if we can be and direct others to be good to one another, that is the way negative things are overcome. I remember one portuguese tv advert that had the intention to remind people to recycle that had a saying that I still carry with me for everything. “Muda o teu mundo, que o mundo muda” translates as “change your own world and the world will change”. I do believe in that and hope one day we can all be thinking about our own actions and thoughts and that will reflect on a better and more positive experience for everyone we share this lovely world with.
    Thank you for this blog Kiki. ❤

    • Dani

      Hi Caty! I am so grateful for your comment. When I write, it’s because I believe in it, in a better world, and that sometimes we don’t do better because we don’t know how. That’s why I share my thoughts. However, actually knowing that you guys are appreciating and that there is an audience for my writings out there, makes it much more rewarding! So, I really want to thank you for your comment. All your interactions, likes and shares are more than statistics for me, but they really show me I should continue! About that saying…I do believe that we can build a better world even if we are not activists or politicians. It purely starts with our daily routine and behavior, the simpler as it can be, regardless of who you are or what you do. Lot’s of love! <3


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